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Author: Closet FetishistWritten: December 8th, 2011
At last, election day; I had been waiting with great anticipation for this day as it was going to be my first opportunity to vote.
I took upon the great privilege with the utmost seriousness and read all the news I could, from both sides, to determine the most informed choice. My state has been in the news as it faces a monumental, so I hear, recall election; what excitement to be apart of something so grand.
The polling place is a local church; I shrug the obvious violation of church and state as I enter God's house, one of millions, each more holy than the previous.
There's a short line, people are showing their IDs and going to the polling rooms; this is so exciting.
I see people going in one of two directions, right or left; mostly minorities go right I noticed while older, well-dressed, and white men and women go to the left. They dart around like they've had one too many wine coolers and don't seem to draw the seriousness from this occasion that I do. Oh well, not going to let it get me down if they choose to take their civic duty lightly.
Finally, I am up; I smile. The polling woman smiles back and points me to the right. I ask why the split and she, politely said, it was for crowd control. It made sense when she said it; I noticed no one ever came back out of the polling rooms but I guess there is probably an exit on the other side.
I open the door and walk through into the small dark room; I feel around, it's the size of a small closet; my body touches flesh; I squeeze gently.
BRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!
A loud fart echoes in the small chamber and quickly fills the room with it's noxious fumes; I bend down, coughing heavily only to have my head stuffed between two cool cheeks. A humid, putrid wind swirls around my nostrils as I hear a laugh and a grumbling.
PRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOPPP!
"Help me!" I scream against the fleshy mounds.
A calm, sensuous voice replies, "Don't bother; it's sound proof."
BRRRRRPPPPPPP! "Ahhhhhhh," she sighs, laughing; "And smell proof. These are all for your dirty little mouth."
"Why?!" I scream.
She laughs loudly as she separates her cheeks; "Open your mouth and take what you give!"
Her asshole opened and out plunged a turd which filled my mouth with it's spicy atrocity.
"Swallow it you little shit mouth!"
BRRRRRAAAAAAPPPP!
She fired off a fart to torment my noses as my mouth gagged on a shit I didn't want to break down by chewing it; I wanted to force it down my throat but it wasn't going.
I bit down and immediately felt like vomiting; and I did.
I hear the woman sigh angrily as her butt seals my vomiting face.
PRPPPPAAAAAUUUUUMMMPPPPP!
I shake wildly before finally passing out.
I awaken in my car; odd. It's nighttime. What the hell happened? I look at my dashboard, the top stub of my voter form. I reach for my keys and feel a sticker on my chest; I look down.
"Vote Republican," the sticker reads.