Pizza Delivery
Author: Closet Fetishist
Written: 2006
Well, it was a Friday night like any other. The parents were going out and my brother was at daycare till late. I usually ordered pizza in this kind of situation and this was no exception. I ordered it and sat in wait for a long time. They were busy that night and quoted me about an hours wait. That was fine with me. If I had one good thing about me it was patience but what I had in that field I lacked in generosity. I was a giant cheapskate! I used every damn coupon and I am sure Pizza Hut hated me for it but whatever, I am not trying to make friends I am just ordering food from a business, there should be no personal feelings there. So any ways I prepare the money, the pizza was $10.75 and I laid out $11.00 dollars, you know just to keep everything even. I knew delivery people already worked in their tip so if they wanna cheat me I will cheat them out of their tip. What the hell all they are doing is delivering the damn thing any ways. But I digress. There was a knock at the door at about 7:00 p.m. I opened it to find a very tall but pretty good looking delivery woman standing there. She wore a stern face however and she seemed a little irked. Her expression scared me a bit. Suddenly, however, it changed. She was suddenly kinda perky and happy.
“Hey, you ordered last week didn’t you?”
“Ya that was probably me.” What the hell was going on with this girl?
“Ya I remember you. Any ways, here is your pizza.” I handed her the money and watched her look at the money. She laughed a bit at the money in her hands.
“Oh shoot! You know what? I forgot your 2 liter in the car come with me to go get it.”
“Uh…alright.” This truly was bizarre but I went to her car. The back door was open already. I spotted the Coke and reached in for it. Suddenly I felt a stern kick to my rear and heard the car door slam behind me. I tried to get our but the doors in the back seat where childproofed (cannot be opened from the inside). The woman came around to the other side, forced and held me down flat, and then sat on my face!
“What the hell are you doing?!” I managed to say, all garbled.
“Teaching you a lesson, you bastard. You think you can just get away with not giving us delivery people tips?! What the fuck is wrong with you!? We bring the shit to your house and you don’t even have the decency to give us at least a damn buck.”
“What I give you madam, is my own choice.” I said calmly but sternly. I knew she would see she was wrong and I was right. She would apologize and I would be on my way.
“Fuck you! I was gonna give you a chance to apologize but no you wanna do this the hard way! Whatever, suits me just fine.” She removed her black uniform pants and proceeded to lower her underweared ass onto my face. I struggled for breath as the pungent aroma of a sweat stained ass was like. I screamed out for mercy but I would get none. She also removed her sock and placed it in my mouth. I gagged quite a bit and threw up a bit but I had to force it back down.
“There, now see what can happen when you don’t tip your servers?”
I mumbled something but no one could hear it any ways and frankly it would not have mattered, not at this point.
“That’s right. And what’s more…oh…oh here we go. Ya, enjoy this….” PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTT! Oh my god I thought to myself. I had just had someone, a girl no less, fart in my face. I was suddenly hit with a rank odor which caused me to gag and choke more but there is nothing I could do but smell all this horrid smell.
“There now! That feels good doesn’t it?” She asked, rhetorically.
I struggled to get free from the ass but I could not, no matter how hard I thrashed. The smell would not go away and soon, PBBBBBBBBBBBBBBTTT! BBBSSSSSSST! BBBPPPTTT! A bombardment of farts hit my face and I was on the verge of passing out from the horrid and noxious aroma. I tried again at a chance at freedom but the ass was strong enough to hold me there. She arched her back forward and PHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSSSHHHHHH! Another fart escaped as I struggled for life under this horrid smell. The car was off so the heat added to the discomfort of this ordeal but I hardly noticed it, the ass was taking up most of my notice.
“Ahhhhhhhhhh! I haven’t farted this freely in years. Feels good! Feels real good! Open you nose for this one.” She pressed down on my stomach and farted just as I began inhaling. The smell was toxic and I would not stay conscious for very much longer and I didn’t. A few minutes later I passed out.
I awoke in my house but I noticed my hands were bound across my chest and my ankles were tied together. I thought to myself, great! My family is gonna see me like this and wonder what the hell is up. Little did I know, it was much worse. I struggled to look behind me and when I was finally able to I noticed a near naked figure coming out of the kitchen. It was eating something from a bowl but I never saw what.
“Ah, good, you’re awake!” I immediately recognized the voice as my tormenter from earlier. It was the pizza delivery woman. Shit, why hadn’t I just tipped her like I should have? What’s the going rate? 20% right? It has been so long that I have forgotten.
“Please, let me go and I will give you your tip that I should have given you and more.”
“Dude, you are tied up and I am in your house! If I wanted money I could just take it…and I will, don’t worry, but you also need to be taught a lesson.
“No, please, I know I was wrong.”
“I am not sure you are. I think you are just saying that to get away from my smelly ass but there is no sympathy or compassion for you. You will have to endure my farts for a long time so better just brace yourself.” The sock was placed back in my mouth and she quickly sat on my face. It wasn’t long before, POOT! A fart ran across my face. I fought for freedom but it was no use and I would have to endure this smelly ass for who knows how long. I attempted to hold my breath.
“Buddy, you are gonna have to breathe some time and when you do,” PFFFFFFFFFTTTT! She farted again. I held my breath for the duration of the most potent part of the fart but I had to breathe. Before I tried she pressed onto my stomach and forced all the air I had out and farted again, right as I began inhaling. The smell was so awful but there was nothing I could do to make it better or go away. My eyes began to tear from the stench and I screamed out for help but it was to no avail. Even if I could, who would hear me? I would be at the mercy of this delivery woman until she decided I had learned my lesson.
“Ahhhh! Doesn’t it smell so good?” She said, laughing hysterically. I was in no condition to speak nor did I want to. All I wanted to do was survive, even if that meant passing out. I was nearing unconsciousness when she lifted her leg a bit to allow some fresher air in. I was relived and saddened at the same time. This meant I would have to endure this more and more. Well, just I had assumed this torture lasted a long time, at least 2 hours. I finally fell unconscious and I think my tormenter was running out of gas. She was really struggling to release at the end there. Didn’t matter thought, the smell was still horribly rank and enough to pass me out, that I was kinda happy with though. My family came home and found me asleep on the couch with everything seemly normal. Mom wondered where the hell her leftover beans and cabbage stew was. I refrained from ordering pizza from then on but one day there was an unexpected knock at the door. I opened it and there stood my tormenter.
“Hey! I was thinking you could use a refresher!”
“Uh…I don’t…”
“Ya me too. On your knees!”
I complied, reluctantly but I knew what disobeying would land me, and she blew a large fart in my face and remained there till she was sure that the smell was absorbed by my nose. She ran back to her car and drove off. I never saw her again but I became generous with my tips from then on, especially if the server/deliverer was female.