Sweet Relief
by American Wonton

WARNING. THIS STORY CONTAINS FART/BUTT DOMINATION, FART/BUTT FETISHISM, SCAT, PISS, AND SEXUAL ENCOUNTERS. READER DISCRETION ADVISED.

Cheryl and I knew our limits alright- we never held anything back from each other. Case and point, her text message that I reached out, right in the middle of the ceremony: “Big load, feeling chunky. Too many in bathroom. Back alley?” See? Nothing held back. I looked up at my old highschool friend as he said his vows, placing the ring on his bride. “Trust me pal, it gets a lot weirder after that,” I thought. I politely excused myself from my row, desperately hoping my chub didn’t show through my pantsuit. When the coast was clear I texted back: “No, wedding reception is in the backyard. Elders room in two minutes. Love you.”

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I was admittedly a little nervous. Worse things have been done in a church, (I geuss) but in a conference room of a church? Most of my fears went away as Cheryl opened the door in the dark room.

She smiled, her bright red lipstick contrasting her pretty black face in the dark. She had a cute orange dress on, showing off every beautiful curve she had. I knelt to my knees in the eyes of god, watching as her heavenly booty turned round. She lifted the dress, revealing a pantiless black booty that I could grab with four hands. Lord have mercy. BBRRRLLLAAAAOOPPPTTTTT! “Oaaaahh...sorry Neal, this has got to be the longest wedding in the history of weddings! Jeez…” She had to bend over and firmly separate her cheeks to fully reveal her puckering pink hole. FFFFLLLTTTTOORRRRTTTT! My dick grew in amazement. She had the butt of five or six skinny girls and some of my friends mocked me for it. Haha, little white guy dating the big fat black girl. The stench would send them roaring in laughter, or disgust. Which was part of the problem I was here to alleviate. PPRRRRRLLBBBPPTTTTTT! “Aoohhhhhhh.” My girlfriend of two years pulled my head against her stink hole, making sure it blocked the smell from her dress. Her booty gurgled again and she grunted. BBLLRRRRBBLLLOTTTTTTT! “You think Casey and Brian do this kind of shit?” She sent another powerful toot my way. Hmm, great minds think alike. “Nah, Brians an accountant graduating at a 3.9 GPA. They probably haven’t even done missionary.”

BBLLRRRAAAAAPPPPTTTT!- that was the response I was given. I sniffed the beany fart, only to realize a sliver of ass dribble beginning to run along her crack. I lapped it up quickly, shivering at the salty taste. Cheryl giggled and tussled my hair. “They probably just don’t love each other enough. Give em’ a few years.” PPOOOOOOOOTTTSSLTT! Her rugged asshole shot another slimy fart in my mouth; I tongued against the pressure, making sure nothing would stain my sweet’s dress.

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Usually, our little detours cost us about 15 minutes. Cheryl had an irritable bowel syndrome; I had sex addiction. Strangely enough our relationship balanced our faults out, but it wasn’t perfect. PPSSSLLLAARRRRPPTTT! I tasted the salami fart with a gag-Cheryl remained seated on my face, only slightly alleviating her 250 pounds of weight. “Oh god...did you take your acidophilus pills? It could explain why you're getting all these meaty farts...oh god…”. I barely managed to finish my sentence as she blasted a 5 second ripper in my face. “Yeah, I did. You smell the salami, right? Turns out it was one of those weird cheese and olive wraps on it too.” BBLLLRRRRAAAAPPBBTT! “Oh yeah, now I smell it...how many did you have?” “Two or three.” FFLLLRRAAAPPBBBTTT! Silence and gagging...her booty betrayed her lies. “Okay, like nine or ten. And five mini tacos.” BBLLRRRLMMPPTSSSTTT!

I endured another two or three more minutes of gas straight into my membrane. I could handle the little stuff around the house, but this much was pure sacrifice. Cheryl had been mocked since high school for being the girl who stunk up the room or had a nasty stain on her shorts. She was my boo and I would be damned if I let it follow this succulent beautiful girl around in adulthood. PLLLLAAARRRRLLPPPTT! “Okay, almost there...almost there.” she said. I felt her asshole pushing and tugging at something vile. Whatever would come out, I’d swallow it just the same as her farts. If someone were to discover us, hopefully the smell would dissipate into my lungs then around her room. Often times it didn’t and I’d get blamed for the room’s deplorable taste. BBLLLRRAAAAAOOOBBPPPTTT! More accurately, her meaty toots would be better blamed on a hippopotamus.

“Okay, hold on...change of plans.” Cheryl switched around, pushing me down further and sitting on my face, her vagina across my lips. This was a much more delectable smell-viscous and damp, but sexy flavoring and raw. “What soda did you get?” I mumbled underneath her vagina flaps. “Coke and whiskey. It’s half price here, I’m about to stock up for the weekend!” “I thought you liked vodka.” “We talked about this! Anything above 12 percent volume gives me gas!” PPRRROOMMPPPPTTTTT! “Ohhh….” Wouldn't want that, now would we?

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I really didn’t know which factor I hated most. Farts faded away but urine...that has a certain staying power. Cheryl sighed as her piss flow began streaming into my mouth. Any normal woman would head on into the bathroom...she was not a normal woman and could stink up an entire house with a toilet visit. Trust me, I’ve had to bring toilet plungers with me when we go on vacation. Her piss tasted like dirty rainwater and other foul acids; I’ve learned to just swallow the build up as quick as possible. My jaw remained rigidly open, so as not to leave a mess on the floor or myself. FFRRLLLLROOOPTTTTTT! “Ohh shit-” Cheryl looked down to see if her noxious fart blew some of her liquids out my mouth. It didn’t; the foul bean and rice scent just added to the stink in my mouth. She relaxed herself, trying to make sure her flow wasn’t harsh enough to spill out of me. I remained open, letting her final squirts turn my teeth yellow.

“Huhkay. Done.” She lumped onto my face, landing the opening of her vagina on my mouth. I tongue inside her, making sure to pick up the last of her droplets. Despite the clinging taste, she tasted delicious. BBBRRRRROOOOOOTTT! “Cahful,” I said, slapping her big booty as it blew my tie with a fat fart. She gave a pleased sigh, leaning down to kiss the top of my head. She knew I wouldn’t mind smelling like a little fart.

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She remained seated for the rest of the show...that, is, knelt above my face, cheeks spread to capacity. “Hold on...hold on.” FFFLLLRRRROOOOTT! “Ahhh...hold on…” PPRRRLLAAABBOOOTT! I watched her asshole pucker into another greasy fart. “They were saying their vows when I left...only a couple stupid songs before everyone’s out.” “I know, hold on! Mouth open.” She let out a not so sexy grunt, leading to a nasty ripper. FFLLRRLTLRRLLTRTTT! God, that was the 5th “hold on” in a minute. “Maybe we can wait till after the reception-” “No, wait, open up!” Cheryl grunted again and I watched hell unleash in a second.

Cheryl knew her feces well. Out of our various designation for her emergency shits, “chunky” was the most dangerous...for both of us. “Orrgggnngghh!” FFLLTT! Barely any air could escape as her log expanded slowly out her asshole. I opened wide, recoiling from the gnarly dead animal smell. I could already taste it-but I was far from salivating. Onward it went- “OHHHhhhh”- and I took my girlfriend’s shit into my mouth. It was hard as week old play doh, with as much nasty taste. “Oh...okay, break!” she managed to squeak out. The shit had already folded into my mouth, filling it completely. I winced as I bit off a chunk, hurriedly chewing. The taste was god awful. I just wanted it to go away, so I made it. Pained swallowing after swallowing. “Okay...round...two!” Her shit plunged forward again...I barely swallowed the last piece before her asshole offered a second helping. PPPTTTT! I could taste the raw meat and cheese packed in an hour long trip from her colon. I wanted to breath, but both sources of oxygen intake were being flooded with disgusting smells. Chew chew, swallow swallow. Two seconds of desperate panting. “Round...UGHRNGH...THREE!”

There’d be no stopping her if I tried. I desperately hoped my friends and family couldn’t see my frantic swallowing of my girlfriend’s shit or that quarterback grunt she was making with that silly face. Trust me, it’s cuter on the other end. PPRRLLTT! Two more rounds of the same turd, still chugging forward. She was right, this was definitley an emergency. I must have swallowed about a whole toilet bowl’s worth of shit. I watched her anus pinch off the final piece. FFFLLLTRRRAAAAOOOTT! I made some sort of gurgling sound as she sharted the last onto my lips. My girlfriend knelt above me, her shit-gaped anus revealing it’s inner self. PPPRRSSSSOOSSSS! I turned my head to the side as the shit flavored air pulsed outward. It was like her asshole panted the last of the stink out, weary of its trials and tribulations. Cheryl sat above me, patting my stomach. “You can do it...you can do it...ohhhh…”. PPPRRSSSSLLLSSSSOOSSSS! Another airy SBD shot into my face, her asshole incapable of giving it that rugged ripple. “Sorry, sorry.” My girlfriend maneuvered out of my face to let me chew in peace.

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All quiet on deck as I licked her butthole clean. Good thing too, I could sure go for a some actual food right now. BBBLLLRRROOTT! Maybe a mint, then. I exited my girlfriend’s anus with us both knowing she was clean. She sighed, turning round to lift me up and rub a little shit stain I’d forgotten to wipe. Hey, we weren’t perfect. But I thought she was.

My turn, although I don’t like to call it that. We both had needs to take care of. I was gracious enough to swallow her feces; she was gracious enough to let me stick it in her big fat pooper. Lord be praised. I watched her lean against the door wall, bending down and parsing a cheek to accommodate for my height and dick length. “You feel like dancing?” she asked bluntly. “Nah I’m way too sick.” FFTTOOOOOOOTTT! “Ohhhh...take your time then.” She smiled and opened an asscheek a little while. Despite the decaying shit smell throughout the room and in my nose and stomach I managed to go full hog. She made her cute little orgasm sounds, as loud as our secrecy in the room would allow. “Ohhh...hrrmmmm...mmmhhmmmm.” I’m not painting the picture well enough, but don’t worry, it was fake. I wasn’t the longest or handsomest rooster, but I was the kindest. She’d taken bigger inside her and although I barely managed to go in halfway, she made me feel like a Spartan. I finished with a minute to spare, which we used to give a few hardy kisses.

“Stay away from the cinnamon rolls,” I whispered, giving her booty a big smack. She grinned, adjusting her dress for the final time as we prepared to go out. “Fine, fine. I wanna try Martha’s cake balls, though. May need to use you later tonight.” She began to walk out the door in front of me, willingly let me gawk at her poop machine hidden under that dress. My god. I couldn’t help another healthy snack as we exited into the hallway. “What size?” I whispered in her ear. “Rabbit droppings. Hopefully.” Her butt was grabbed again by me. “Stay away from the cinnamon rolls.” BBRRRLLLLLBBLLRRPPBOOTTTT! She kissed me, giving zero fucks of the loud, obnoxious fart blowing into my hands and her dress. “No promises.” I felt relieved she did so.