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Focus Tester Man, I could almost feel the wad of cash lining my pocket. Trust me, I’d rather imagine the invisible $1,500 dollars than the 50 bucks I had on me now. The sign certainly boosted my enthusiasm. “Product testers wanted! $1500 a session!” How could I, a poor college student, pass up an offer like that? There was also some stuff in the flyer, safety crap, age conditions, yada yada yada. I skimmed straight down to the date, time, and location. This was going to be the best financial decision ever! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- “Hi everyone I’m Molly! Thanks for coming.” Molly was a plump 20-something white girl, sporting a pair of yoga pants and a tight crew shirt. She certainly didn’t look the “scientist, market research” type. “Alright, if you’ll all follow me to the research lab we can take roll call along the way. Let’s see here...Hank?” I answered her, “Here!” She went on, scribbling the names of the other participants on her notepad. There were five of us total, 3 guys and 2 girls. All of them looked to be eager young college students like myself. Except, for reasons I didn’t know, they didn’t look too eager for this. “Alright everyone seems to be accounted for.” said Molly, sitting on a science stool inside the lab. Well, I say lab. It looked more like Frankenstein's lair with its cement walls and zero windows. “Right then. I’ll go over the rules for some of you newcomers. As you have read in the waivers earlier, this experiment requires some more...venture, let’s say.” Molly unwrapped a ham sandwich from a nearby lunchbox and took a bite. Despite her mouth being somewhat full, she continued. “Now if any of you have any reasons to not participate, you are free to leave now. Once the experiment has started it CANNOT be stopped. You will be compensated afterwards.” To my surprise, the sandwich disappeared completely into her mouth...to which, she began unwrapping a burrito from the lunchbox. “Well, let’s not delay, shall we? Everyone into the hotboxes!” She said that sentence so giddily. I turned around to see my fellow test subjects crawl into a series of connected cubby holes. They were dog caged sized, but they all barely managed to fit in. I stared in confusion; that was, until Molly put her hand on my shoulder. “Mr. Hank, was it? Do you have any reason for leaving?” she asked. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a guy hop out of his cage, his hands covered by his mouth. “By Mr. Allen! See you next time perhaps?” said Molly. She turned her eyes to me...so sweet looking. “Mr. Hank?” “Oh, yeah sorry. No, I’m good.” With that, I awkwardly made for the cage and crawled inside. Jesus, I could see why that guy needed some fresh air. It smelled like they houses pigs in here! Whatever, I’ve worked on farms before...no biggie. “Alright, let’s begin!” said Molly. With a burrito in hand she began locking the cages one by one. Now I felt like a pig myself. A few minutes of Molly working later, she stood before us in pride. A series of connected hoses stuck from each glass pane of the boxes, all leading to a tube held by Molly. “Alright everyone,” said Molly, waving the tube and a hotdog in her hand. “Let’s begin!” To my bewilderment, she shoved the tube down her pants. A timer was pressed, signaling the start. Then: BBRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPTTTTTT! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Now I found out where the cage smell had come from. The fart was similar in smell, but fresher, with the salty texture of her hotdog pushing through. “Ahhhh. 20 seconds. Good work everyone,” said Molly. BLLLLLLLLLLLTTTTTT! I gagged as more rancid gas ran along the tubes. What the hell kind of test was this?! FFRRRRRPBBBBTTT! BBBLLLLOOOTTTTTT! PPRRRRRRRPPPP! My cellmates shared the discomforted looks that I gave. My air became stagnant with hot farts and greasy food. Looking up I felt sick; Molly was munching on tacos, the beef and hot sauce dripping from her chin. FFRRRRRLLLBBBBTTT! “Ahhh,” she sighed, a look of pure release on her face. I could taste the smell of taco meat through the tube. I turned my nose away, trying to find a safe place to hide my nose. It was fair, I was still in the box. I was still participating, right? BBRRRRPPBBBTTSTTTSTHT! A slimy 10 second fart rippled across her pants and I could tell that I was going to be a full participant, no matter what. BBBBLLLRRROOOOTTT! “Oh god, yes!” said Molly, patting her stomach on a job well done. She looked across the cages; I saw one girl slumped across the cages. Molly stood, part of a chicken wing in her hand. “Ashley?” said Molly, tapping the glass. FFRRRPPPTTTTTT! The girl didn’t shake in disgust like the rest of us. “Ah well there you go folks! The power of RANK-10 edibles! On sale now, gentleman, for any of you who came here for the fetishes.” PPLLLLLBBBBBOOORRT! Molly smiled at the rest of us, eager to see if their were any fans of her flatulence. I felt like puking...who would come here for this crap?! Molly laughed then opened Ashley’s cage. A stream of nearly visible heat wafted towards her. “Whooo! We’ve reached the 5 minute mark everyone. Keep it up!” FFRRRRPPPPTTT! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I don’t know how Molly could fart nonstop for 30 minutes. FFRRRLLPPPTTT! Then again, I don’t know how I was still conscious for 30 minutes. BBBRRRRRLLBBBBTT! My body jumped as I felt tapping on the glass. “C’mon Mr. Daryon, don’t fake it. You’re going to mess with the results.” PPRRSSSSSSHHHHTTT! My cellmate jolted awake at the smell of the sour fart pounding his nose. Poor guy; he still wanted the money, but wasn’t able to work for it. PPPRRRROOPSTTTSHHTTTTTBBBSSHHTTT! That fart wasn’t just a fart. Our eyes were blurry and red but we could still see the outlines of Molly’s yoga pants stretch. PPSSSHBBHTT! Molly closed her eyes and sighed, taking in the scent of her feces. To her, it seemed delectable. To us, it was pure pain. I couldn’t hold it in anymore, puking amongst the smell of acidic diarrhea. Some of the shit had even made it’s way along the tube. “Daryon? Are you still faking it?” Molly walked to Darion's cage; he was slumped over against the side of the glass. Molly frowned, then turned to place her fat ass against the cage. BBRROMLLLLLPPPTTT! Along with smelling the shit rocket forward, I saw a few specks coat the glass as it shot out her pants. Daryon was unfrightened by the events. “Welp, another one down,” Molly said disinterested. Daryon was released. 45 minutes...I was still here. FFFFLLRRRROOPPTTT! I could barely see out of the cage. Her farts had now coated the glass, fogging it up and adding a translucent heatwave of poop particles. PPRRLLLLBBBPPPPP! My head was spinning and I could feel my nose burning with ever bitter toot. BBRRRRROOOTTT! That was a strong one. An eggier smell was added to the list of meat, shit, and...christ knows what else. I felt the methane build up inside me. It was over. I blacked out. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I woke up in the same room, smelling roses and lilacs. Looking around I could see scented candles lining the room. It was all so peaceful...so...wonderful. FFFFRRROOOPPPTTTT! I jumped as one of the candle flames leaped at me. “Oh jeez, I’m sorry!” Molly’s familiar smell and voice came back into play. “I usually try to liven up the room once I’ve stunk up the place.” I wound my hands around my torso. Molly smiled, reaching behind a counter. I took a look at her dangerous behind and was somewhat drawn to it. If she wasn’t so disgusting, it might be kind of cute. “Kind of strange what people will do for money, eh Mr. Hank?” BBBBLLLLLTTTTTT! Now that the air was cleared,(figuratively, I geuss) she didn’t seem to mind masking her flatulence. “Yeah, well, $1,500 hundred dollars is a lot, so….” I said. She looked back up, surprised. “Oh, the $1500 dollars? You’re here for that?” My face went white as my head went blank. “I...yeah. That’s what this was for, wasn’t it?” Molly laughed at my cluelessness, letting out small little farts as she did so. It was REALLY starting to annoy me. “Mr. Hank, did you read the flyer? The experiment only goes $200 dollars a session. The $1500 dollars is an insurance backup, in the case of injury or brain damage.” My mouth went agape. “Are you kidding me?!” I shouted. “I did that for only $200 dollars?! I felt like I was going to die! There’s no doubt I have brain damage!” FFFFLLLLBBBPPLLLLL! I moved further away, barely catching a whiff of her insulting stench. “Well I’m sorry, unless you can prove it in court, I’m afraid $200 dollars is what you get.” Molly stood there with the money in her hands. God I didn’t want to walk into her firing range. I wish she’d just throw it at me. “Unless, you want to do cleanup,” she said. “I can get you $500 dollars for that.” It sounded devious...but I was desperate for cash after this ripoff. “What’s cleanup?” I asked. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I knelt underneath Molly’s naked ass. It looked far bigger and revolting up close. She giggled, gently prying her ditry asscheeks open. I could see the caked on shit running across her asscrack. I had a lot of work to do. “Now remember, you signed the extra waiver so…”. I didn’t even let Molly finish her sentence before diving in. Then, I dived right back out. One whiff of her asscrack sent me spinning. “Jesus, do you ever wash down here!” I said. BBBLLRRRBBBBBB! I turned my head as she spoke. “Well, not really. I got a guy friend who usually does this for me. You know, you remind me of him a bit. He was poor and needed the money. He’s also kind of pathetic. He practically begs me for this now!” PPPRRRRRRRRRTTTT! A remnant of her ham sandwich coated my face. Licking along her salty asscrack, I found this to SO not be worth 500 bucks. PPFFFFLLTTT! PPRRRRRBBBTOOTT! She had explicitly stated that she was not liable for whatever her ass produced during the cleaning process. She seemed to keep that fact very much in mind. PPSSSHHARRRRTT! With my mouth wide open I felt her asshole shoot liquid waste into my mouth. “Oh, sorry, thought I was all out!” Molly said. BBRRRRRRBBBBB! Feeling her farts line my teeth, I somehow doubted that. After a good 10 minutes of cleaning, I stood with the cash in my hand. Molly’s smile and goodbye wave felt bitter as her rancid shit was mixing with my spittle. “Now remember, it’s TWO HUNDRED dollars a session, okay? So will be seeing you soon?” Molly said. BBBRRRRRMMMMPPPTTTT! As her greasy fart washed over me, I remembered the talk about her “guy friend”. I prayed to christ I wouldn’t become that desperate. I nodded, then walked out the door. Molly’s farts echoed throughout the walls as I left. |
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