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Troubleshooting
Author: Closet Fetishist

Written: January 10th, 2018


"Thanks for coming over, Alyssa," I say, holding the door open as I stand in the doorway greeting her.

Her beach blonde hair glows against the sun at her back, her cute smile as she stands there on my doorstep, "So...are you going to invite me in?"

"Oh, yes, yes of course, please," I stutter as I step aside for her to walk in. My eyes dart to her ass looking so perfect in her tiny white jean shorts but I'm quick to recover as I close the door and guide her towards the living room.

"Can I get you anything to drink?" I offer.

"Just a water, please."

"Have a seat on the couch, I'll be right back," I say as I scurry away towards the kitchen. I quickly grab a glass and fill it with water from the tap. I practically race out back to the living room, not wanting to keep Alyssa waiting. She's sitting on the couch, her eyes casually looking around the room before turning her attention back to me with the water, she smiles as I hand her the glass.

"Thank you," she replies. She takes a quick sip of water before setting in down quickly, "So tell me what the trouble is."

"The trouble?" I ask befuddled.

"You said you were having computer trouble..."

"Oh yes! I was...I am, yes," I stammer.

"So what's the problem?" She asks as her face scrunches a little bit before...ppssssrrruuRRRRRRPPP!

It sounded as if she tried to fart quietly but it came out very loud at the tail end. I am in total shock but I try to stay expressionless and not sniffle my nose or anything that would give me away; her expression turns to soft embarrassment.

She laughs it off, "I am so sorry! I thought that was going to be silent, I swear to god!"

I chuckle, trying to hide my nervousness, "Heh, no problem at all, it happens."

"Really?" She asks suspiciously, "You're not grossed out?"

I think about it for a second, what would a normal person say I wonder to myself. "Uh no, it's natural, you know?"

She chuckles, "Yeah, I guess. I hope it doesn't smell too badly."

"No, it's fine," I chuckle back, desperately wanting to sniffle a nostril and smell what she laid. A bit of the soft eggy aroma blows casually past my nose, or perhaps I'm imagining it, fantasizing what it must smell like.

"So you were saying about the computer..." she asks, putting the conversation back on track.

"Uh...yeah, I seem to be having some problems with my browser."

"Like what kind of problems? Can I see your computer?" She asks, clearly interested and in her element.

"Sure," I say, pointing her over to the computer, "It's just problems like it seems to lock up and freeze a lot, there's a lot of popups too." I walk over with her to the desk.

"Too much porn?" She asks pointedly.

My eyes go wide, "Uh...what, no why wou...no, not at all."

"I'm kidding, I have tons of porn on my computer but you gotta be safe about it, you gotta know where to browse," she says as she takes a seat at the computer. She leans her butt slightly to the right, FRRRRrrraaauuupppppp!

She looks relieved after that fart as she sighs quietly, then she turns to me, "You don't mind, right?"

"No, no, not at all...no," I stammer nervously, am I being too obvious?

She smiles sweetly and turns her attention back to the computer, "Let's try a speedtest first." She starts to type in www dot and then the letter T when a huge list of sites from my browsing history appear. She stops and glances at the list and I take a quick peek over her shoulder. I start to panic as I notice...

"TheFartCloset.com?" She says aloud in mild disbelief.

"Wha...really? How did...what is that?" I stumble over words to try to figure out a legitimate explanation, but I have none and I'm sure my covering is just make it all the more obvious.

She clicks on the result and up pops an all black page with images of women sitting on mens' faces, "What is this?" She asks, seemingly rhetorically. In concentration, she returns to the address bar and starts to type the letter F; her eyes glowed over the bright white history bar which featured such results as fart captions, fart fetish, fart forums, and fart + pornhub.

"Oh, I see," Alyssa says with a new sense of understanding.

"It's not...I'm not sure how...I think maybe I got hacked or..."

She grins as she turns her head to me, looking devilish like a demon, "Get down on your knees."

"What?" I ask in shock.

She stands, towering just a inch or so above me, "On your knees," she raises her voice with greater authority.

I shake a bit, staring into her eyes that seem to burn with fire behind them as I slowly drop to my knees on the floor.

She smirks at me. "Get behind the chair, your face right here," she demands, pointing towards the back of the chair closest to the seat.

I do as she asks, hesitantly as she snickers, "Why didn't you say you enjoyed farts? I could have been giving you all of mine, all the time." There's not a hint of sarcasm in her voice, she seems wholly serious. "You're a sick fuck!" She adds as she takes a seat on my chair, pushing her butt back towards where she ordered my face to be.

"I'm glad I don't have to hold back my farts anymore, this is going to open so many doors for us I am absolutely certain," she says as she peels down her tight jeans and shoves her stinky bare ass in my face, still ripe from her previous farts and who knows how many she dropped before she got here.

FFFFFRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrraaaauuuuuuuuuppppppppp!
"Ahhhhh...how does that smell?" She asks me as she turns and grabs me by the back of the head and shoves my face as close to her ass as it can go through the bars of the wooden chair. "Sniff it! Is it as good as you imagined?"

I cry out, "No, please stop! It's awful!"

"Awww, is that so? Maybe it's the raw veggies I ate for lunch before I came? I like keeping to a raw diet but it sure does make for some nasty farts," she boasts.

I try to pull away from her stench but she holds me rather easily, my face pressed close enough to feel the heat and sweat coming off the crack of her ass. I can smell the potent rotten cabbage aroma that emanates from it, it seems to never dissipate in strength and my nose never able to get used to it.

"You know what," she says excitedly, "I want to sit on your face. And from all these links, I think you want that as well."

"I don't, I don't, please!" I plea with her desperately.

"No need to beg," she insists as she grabs a tuft of my hair and swings my head down to the seat of the chair before she sits her bare ass on it, smashing her smelly crack against my nose. I muffle out a cry but it's completely incoherent.

PRRRRRRRrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaabbbbbbbbbbbbbb!
"Mmmmm...that was warm," she laughs as I hear her fingers clacking over the keyboard.

My body seizes, freezing momentarily as her burning hot gas assaults my face with a deep, eggy stench that hangs over me like a chemical weapon. Repeatedly, with each inhale, it refreshes my senses with another rancid odor that tormented me anew.

"Let's see what some of these sites are," I hear her announce towards me. She clicks and types, I hear various videos, some familiar, some I'd never heard before. "Oh this looks good, if I just..." she trails off as she grabs my lower jaw and prys it open. She positions her asshole over my forced open mouth, pressing her ass down over my as far as it will go; until my lips press against the ridges of her anus. I moan out in panic just before her asshole strongly pushes out at me and rips a long, loud fart right down my throat. RRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrruuuuuuuuuuppppppppp! It echoes and rumbles painfully in my mouth which elicits a delighted laugh from Alyssa. Her gas feels moist, humid in my mouth; her sweat drips off the back of her crack down into my face, burning at my eyes as it passes by.

"Tell me how my fart tastes!" She demands as I continue to flail and whimper beneath her. "Tell me!" She repeats more forcefully.

"It tastes like shit..." I manage to murmur out with my lips squeezed in deep between her cheeks. What did she even want me to say, that I enjoyed her farts? I thought I would but how ever did I think I would enjoy this?

"Shit? That doesn't sound right, perhaps another big one down your throat will help you taste more clearly," she says. She pushes her buttcheeks together, sealing my head in total darkness. PRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!

She sighs with great exaggeration, "There now, surely that tasted better."

I convulse softly as her horrific aroma fills my nostrils, a rich, sour chocolatey aroma that strikes like a bomb. I scream a muffled cry once I can muster the ability to do so but Alyssa only grinds her ass against my face in response, giggling with glee as she does. My legs twitch and kick with an automatic response in an attempt to find something, some instinctual strength, to save myself but she steadfastly pins me under her ass.

"One more, right up your nose I think," she proclaims, already positioning herself for the upcoming blow. I vainly shake my head, trying to persuade her against it but she wasn't listening to my pleas. Her anus pulses profoundly against my nose, I can feel her greasy butthole rub against the tip; softly I moan out, my mouth muffled against her moist taint.

She leans forward as if she is reaching for something, it makes her already prominent butt bulge in just the way I would like if it were not sitting on my face. Kinda ironic. FFFFFRRRRRRRRUUUUUUIIIIIIIIIPPPPPPPPPPPPP!

"Ahhhhh...perfect, that felt so flappy," she laughs, ensuring her ass keeps a tight seal over my face. I try to buck free from the terrible smell but it's useless, there's no escaping it. "That is quite the experience, I appreciate you turning me on to it," she chuckles as she rubs her dirty crack over my face some more, treating it like toilet paper.

I sputter weakly, my body fading after such an assault and lack of oxygen for what felt like it would never end. My breathing is labored, pained through my burning throat. "This was fun. I'm just gonna send myself a few of your links here, do a little studying and I think you can come over to my house tomorrow so we can continue this adventure. Oh and I fixed your computer."

Finally, mercifully, she stands and I get my first real breath of fresh air but I feel too weak to stand, I pant and heave deeply as I greedily try to suck down oxygen like a fish out of water. "Just watch those porn sites, get a free anti-virus program," she continues as she walks out the door, then she turns around deliberately and stops, "And if you don't show up tomorrow when I text you, well I'll just stop by again."

I hear in her voice the seriousness of her threat, the implication that I would not like it if she had to come to me tomorrow. I softly nod in response though I doubt she saw it before he headed towards the entryway and out the door. I hear the door shut as I remain there, huffing the tainted remnants of her farts in the air around me.

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